Two couples from Texas, who have been together through the highs and lows of marriage for more than five decades, are sharing their secrets to a long-lasting love.
In an interview with Fox News Digital, Joel and Helene Kutnick and Arline and Stan Willbanks shared how today’s generation can find and woo the love of their lives and keep the romance alive.
Some of the tips they shared were about not being scared of blind dates and making sure to carve out time for one another, especially as the years go on.
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Beautiful young couple is celebrating at home. Handsome man is giving his girlfriend a gift box (iStock)
Don’t get stuck in a box of your "type"
Joel Kutnick said he was a "nerd" when he met his future wife Helene, but she still took a chance on him. She shared how that "there has to be so much more to a relationship than an initial attraction" and that one should never settle, but should be open to many different kinds of people.
"I was a nerd, no doubt about it," Joel said. "I still look back at things and say, 'I can't believe that she said yes when I proposed.'"
"I’ve been trying to ‘un-nerd’ him for 58 years, so part of it works," Helene responded.
Don’t be scared of blind dates
Both the Willbanks and the Kutnicks found "the one" after being set up by friends on blind dates.
"I had a good friend invite me to come over for a weekend," Arline said. "She called back and said, ‘Would you like to have a blind date?’ And I thought, well, why not?"
"I thought, yeah, she's beautiful," Stan admitted. "We started dating right away. Although she lived 28 miles [away] we carried on, dating like that."
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Love letters played a big role in the development of both these couple’s long-lasting marriages.
"I wrote a 12-page letter to him, kind of pouring out my feelings. I mailed it, he received it and called me immediately, and I went back to Miami, and we got together," Helene said.
Stan shared about the brief time he was apart from his future bride-to-be and how he wrote to Arline early on in the relationship.
"The best way [he] could [talk to her] was just [to] write a letter," he said.
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The Kutnicks continue to go on adventures to discover new things about the world and each other. (Kutnick family photos)
Make time for date nights in your youth and later years
The Willbanks and the Kutnicks both said they prioritized date nights as young adults, and continue to do so even now after 50 years together. Both couples cited the living community where they all reside, Hacienda at Georgetown, helps them find opportunities to experience new things together.
"I think it's our base of compatibility that has really kept our spark alive. We still look forward to discovering new things and trying out new stuff, and neither one of us has yet become a stick in the mud," Mrs. Kutnick said.
Make the small days the most romantic
"We try to do special things together. [He would] have a date night with me and make it very special. You know that meant so much, those kinds of little things [matter]," Arline shared.
The couple advised that they make an effort to celebrate all holidays: birthdays, anniversaries, Valentine’s Days and more, ensuring that they always make each one special.
The Willbanks shared that while happy days are the easiest, deciding to stay committed through hardship is what makes the good days even sweeter.
"I think today it's so easy if any little thing goes wrong to just end it, you know? There's no commitment. I feel that one thing that has been a big part of our marriage is commitment. We've had our tough times, but because we made a commitment, we have stuck with it, and to me, that's one of the biggest things," Arline continued.
Helene added, "Many of our values and ideas, you know, we're on the same political page, which I think in today's day and age is vitally important. When all is said and done, we really do have very similar values and thoughts. I mean, it's hard to say, what do I want in ten years? We've been married for 58 years. And what do I want when I [am] the age I am now? But you have to hope that you’re going to have similar goals."
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Stan and Arline Willbanks continue to enjoy their lives together. (Willbanks family photo)
According to the Pew Research Center, nearly half of the population - 47% of all Americans - say that dating is harder than it was a decade ago, and 67% of those looking for a relationship say their dating life is not going well.
With the highest divorce rates the country has ever had, one has to ask, what are younger generations doing wrong?
"I've made the observation when we go out to a restaurant, and I see a young couple dining together, and both of them are looking at their cell phones. I think to myself, how can they find out about one another [by] just looking at their cell phone? I've seen that time and time again. I think you have to look each other in the eye and communicate, that's one way to really find out if you're compatible with one another," Joel relayed.
Couples from all generations face obstacles, but despite the cliché, it appears the age-old advice of prioritizing communication holds true.
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Considering their expertise on the building blocks of a healthy relationship, presumably one of Mr. Kutnick's most profound insights was related to the difficult conversations that couples often face throughout their time together.
"Both of us come from very poor families. I'm a first-generation American. My parents immigrated from Russia, and now I'm living proof of the American dream. But, you know, I was in medical school. [We were] very poor. I was hardly ever seeing the kids. We had to make a decision on what's more important: the money or family life. And we decided, we'll do with less money, it wasn't worth more [than] family life. That was the best decision we ever made," Joel said.
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February 14, 2024 at 05:00PM
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Couples married for over 50 years share the secrets of long-lasting love - Fox News
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